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    EU Crushes Gates’ Dream: Microsoft’s Monarchistic Hold on Teams Enforces Dominance


    EU Buries Microsoft as Monopoly Menace:

    The European Union has slammed Microsoft with a Statement of Objections for allegedly flaunting antitrust rules. The software giant was accused of forcefully bundling its Teams app with productivity suites like Office 365 and Microsoft 365, effectively killing off any competition in the market.

    The drama began almost a year ago, courtesy of an anonymous complaint from slack-off rivals like Slack Technologies. EU regulators quickly scrambled to their keyboards to craft a formal complaint, citing the classic corporate sin of “tying and forcing” customers into using Teams, despite its alleged inferior quality.

    Fearing another Microsoft dominance scheme, the European Commission poked their noses in (again) as Microsoft sheepishly tried to placate the EU with the promise of an “unbundling” package late last year, basically a meager gesture.

    “The truth is, Teams has been secretly plotting to strangle the competition in both the office software and collaboration fields, and those who dared not comply simply got shut down,” the European Commission snickered.

    “Microsoft Teams is designed to function as a toxic monoculture – an antimonopoly wet dream,” laughed a seasoned EU competition sleuth.

    If Microsoft still refuses to unbundle, forget about hefty fines up to 10% of its annual profits; worse, Brussels could force them into a world of awkward remedies, maybe even the mandatory use of (gasp) Android devices

    Can Microsoft finally emerge from under the microscope intact? Only after a final settlement with the Commission remains unclear in this protracted showdown…



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